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Bachelor Party Favors

Bachelor Party Favors: Six that Don’t Suck

Let’s be brutally honest. No one wants a personalized bachelor party beer cozy. Or flask. Or shot glass. Or personalized bachelor party anything. Personalizing is cheesy and it’s overkill. In fact, intrepid Best Man, no matter what party favors you offer at the end of your debauched weekend, you’re likely to encounter some snark: “what is this, a bridal shower?”  So here are six groomsmen gift ideas guaranteed to shut those haters down.  Stuff they’ll appreciate, use and enjoy rather than mock, toss or re-gift.

1) Plain Small Duffel Bag
Key words: plain and small.  No silly vintage logos, gaping pockets or complicated straps.  Splurgers, go for the Filson Tin Cloth, in tan or dark tan, which comes with a charming re-waxing tin. The rest of us will be quite happy with an olive green army duffel.  Cleverly, this becomes the packaging device for all the other gifts and can be easily folded up and tucked into luggage, too.

2) Meaty Snack
Every decent gift bag has at least one edible component, and what’s more bachelor-y than chewy, rough-hewn strips of meat? Go several tiers above Slim-Jim, of course, and spice it up with a variety: spicy ostrich, anyone? Make sure the packages are re-sealable.

3) Spotify Gift Card
This one hits the gift-card sweet spot: it’s a bang for your buck you can really feel ($10 for a month of music!), and it’s something everybody’s guaranteed to enjoy.  You can buy it almost anywhere!

4) A Stag Tie
A necktie with deer-print is a cleverly understated way to remind the boys of your stag party, long after it’s over. They’ll smile every time they put it on, and no one else needs to get the reference.  Opt for charming over kitschy, something they’ll actually wear.


5) Booze-Infused / Infused Booze
As if you didn’t drink enough.  Send the boys packing with beer-flavored jellybeans, bourbon toothpicks, or – if they’re not taking a plane – a bottle of Siracha-flavored beer.  Hair-of-the-dog comes in lots of different forms, all just a Google away.  Before buying in bulk, do a taste test; a party favor that induces wretching is, by definition, not a favor.

6) Vintage Pulp Fiction
Something to read and chuckle over on the plane ride home. 1950’s dime-store novels are a lot like bachelor parties: a titillating burst of messy transgression; dirty, secret, throwaway fun. They’re pretty easy to find for cheap on Ebay or specialized vintage fiction outlets, or in your local used bookstore. Look for racy cover art and ridiculous titles, i.e. “Horizontal Secretary.”

Cheers,
Will

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