Offbeat Bachelor Party Activities: The Top Eight
Emphasis here is on the “active” in “activity.” If the party is a whole weekend, you’ve got a lot of hours to fill, and do you really want all of them to be a bloated drunken fog? Other than the stultifying weight of tradition, there is no good reason why a bachelor party needs to involve strippers or gambling as its centerpiece activity. Don’t most of us really want something different?
Grilling over an open flame, sleeping under the stars, pissing in the woods. These are primal male pleasures, but once you’re betrothed, your camping days are likely numbered. Wherever you are in this great country, there’s a sweet camping spot within an easy drive: a state or national park with campgrounds or cabins, a nicely-sited RV park, somebody’s cousin’s hunting land. Or go someplace truly unforgettable, like Assateague Island or the Appalachian Trail on the east coast, or Moab or Big Sur out west.
Skip those cheesy family walking tours and the caverns with colored lights. Instead, strap on a headlamp and prepare to get very, very muddy. Exploring the subterranean world is an exhilarating, and woefully underappreciated, adventure. Scrambling and sliding, hoisting each other through fissures, marveling over geologic wonders, sometimes even – gulp – swimming underwater: after a day of this, your bachelor party will feel changed, stronger and bonded in a whole new way.
For a reasonable fee, most car junkyards will sell you a few old scrappers and deliver them to your doorstep. That’s when the fun begins. You can either rampage wantonly with sledgehammers like Tigers fans, or break up into teams and see who can dismember and dismantle their car into the tiniest pieces. Variations are endless.
Or think bigger: tear down a house! Demo parties are quite the rage these days: all it takes is a friend who’s about to gut-renovate, or better yet, who’s just bought a tear-down and needs to clear it altogether. Barring that, call a contractor; in exchange for a small fee to “supervise,” they’ll let your party be a volunteer crew. Keep each groomsman to their own section of drywall, safely spaced apart.
Bounce and Dodge
At the same time, with trampoline dodgeball! Paintball has been done to death, after all. Here’s a bachelor party game that’s way more athletic and satisfying. It’s your own brute strength that’s responsible for beaning your brother to tears.
For a posher maritime weekend, charter a yacht and explore Culebra and Vieques in Puerto Rico, or the Apostle Islands of Lake Superior. Swim, fish and sightsee right from the deck. If you’re feeling particularly rich, hire an on-board chef in addition to the captain.
Hit the Ropes
At this point, the nation is positively littered with zip-line/ropes and obstacle parks. Any will do for a couple hours of fun, but for the more discerning crowd, opt for a something better than a denuded hillside or parking lot. Look for canopy tour zip-lines in tall, vast forests, natural features like cliffs and waterfalls, ropes courses that require some skill, parks that are not kid-friendly.
Race or Rally
Car lovers, you’re not forgotten. While in Vegas, smoke up the track with Exotic Racing, which offers bachelor party packages including pro-driver instruction and 5 laps behind the wheel of an “exotic” racer. In Alabama, Atlanta or LA, sign up for the Porsche Driving School.
Or, if you prefer slower speeds, in a sputtering Pinto, try “24 Hours of LeMons,” (get it? lemons). It’s an “endurance race” for beaters that cost $500 or less, with events across the country throughout the year. You and your team buy the car, drive the car, and are responsible for the inevitable onslaught of repairs along the way. Talk about bachelor bonding! It’s as wackily chaotic as it sounds.
Find Fun At Your Doorstep: Beach House / Fishing Shack / Ski Lodge
Instead of cramming adventure into a few short hours, a long drive away, find a weekend rental where you can roll out of bed and have your fun, then and there. For even less hassle still, pre-stock the house with necessary rental gear and toys. And if you really need a stripper, order in.